Das Mixture

Beantown Bound?

A quick, but robust congratulations to my brother-in-law Scott, who not only spanked his marathon PR, but qualified for Boston with a gun time of 3:19 and change!

Working It Off

Opening Statement

Good luck to my brother-in-law, Scott, who by vritue of his speed makes me part of the SLOW category, as he works for a marathon PR at the Space Coast Marathon.

Doctors cannot be definitive, hence I opt to listen to myself, which means I hung out with Houston Fit for a ten mile run on Saturday. Yes, indeed my foot is injured in some way, but since thus far noboby can tell me exactly what the injury is, well, being male and all...

Seriously, I have heard everything from "nerve damage" to "cancer" (Cancer, really?), hence I'm playing it by my ear and since I can manage the pain, I am running.

Fred Garvin tells me that I did ten miles at a 9:20 pace which is not too bad considering I was doing nada for two weeks. Not to mention, I needed to do something to work off a few racks of ribs and several pounds of pumpkin cheesecake. The good news is that each mile was progrssively faster.

Interesting moments during the run. Afer a water stop (just beyond Mile 5 - ish), there was a group of four of us running together for several miles. For a period of time I thought this might be one of those unspoken moments when the group as a whole pulls everyone along, but it was not to be. After about three miles, the runner who was the de facto leader started to falter - the interesting thing was I heard it in his foot fall before I physically saw it. In that minute I knew he was not long for the group and indeed, he shortly fell off and the group fell apart. It made me wonder if this is the type of stuff that happens in the lead pack of a race.

Listening to: Rosarito - Long Beach Dub All-Stars

Closing Argument: Congrats to Melissa who is moving to DC to do stem cell research. That's right, I have friends in the scientific community who could clone me - be careful what you ask for...

Giving Thanks

Opening Statement

Sure didn't want to be left off the thankfulness train as it roared out of the station.

I am thankful there are options to shorty short running shorts. Yes, indeed I have damn sexy legs, but some things should be left to the imagination.

I am thankful that SPAM email still pisses me off; that way I know they haven't won yet.

I am thankful that thick headbands haven't made a comeback; some things that happened in the 70's need to stay in the 70's.

I am thankful my wife is not a slave to tradition; turkey on Thanksgiving - fuggedaboutit!

I am thankful my Chinese Zodiac sign is the Tiger, which means I am stubborn, but also means I am trustworthy and inteleegent intelligend intelligent.

I am thankful there are just enough slow runners to make me feel good about myself.

I am thankful that my doctor only has to grope and poke once a year.

I am thankful for the many fine craft breweries in these United States - Anheuser Busch is not a craft brewery.

I am thankful that my representatives to the House and Senate always do what is best for the American people and don't let politics and special interests get in the way.

I am thankful my father-in-law knows all the stuff about homes that I never will.

I am thankful for fake plants.

I am thankful our cat realizes that compared to him I am all powerful and knowing and that I am the master of all time, space and dimension.

I am thankful Jessica Alba is not in love with me (at least overtly); my wife would so kick her ass and I would watch.

I am thankful that I do not live in a climate where upon rolling out of bed this morning I would seriously be rethinking that Turkey Trot.

I am thankful for family gatherings and all the old stories - even if I have heard them a hundred times.

Listening to: Gemini Dream - The Moody Blues

Closing Argument: While you nutcases are lining up for cheap electronics tomorrow morning I will be asleep - Remember, you get what you pay for and if that deal is too good to be true... Seriously, think of this as a public service announcement. Many of the electronics advertised to get you in the door are not only limited in quantity, but are derivatives made with cheaper parts. 

Behold the Spirit

Opening Statement

BEER they told me pa rum pum pum pum...

The Season approaches and I applaud those of you who have stayed in the Thanksgiving moment and opted not to stray or be swayed by the omnipresence of decorations and displays that are merely around not to induce the spirit but to reduce the cash in your wallet.

Thank goodness for some levity...

Christmas creep is everywhere and the only reminders of the coming season we really need right now are what are the upcoming parties and which ones do I choose.

With that in mind, it is my pleasure to announce the return of The 12 Beers of Christmas and that you are all invited! Seriously, Southwest has many of non-stop flights from Tampa, Orlando, Denver and other assorted departure cities and we have a spare bedroom and plenty of floor space. If you can't make it on December 18th, you can read the blog entry on December...let's just say prior to 2010.

We're switching things up slightly this year in that a few of the brews will be the same, but from different years. It will be interesting to see what the aging process does. And by no means is anyone expected to drink 12 bottles of beer; I own a plethora of tasting glasses for a reason.

You'll be hearing more about The 12 Beers of Christmas in coming weeks. If you are in the Houston area and did not receive an "Evite" it means the email address I have on file is not current and I totally blame you for not corresponding with me more often. You know what to do if you want attend.

The Current Season

I weep for those who stand on tradition merely because that's what 300 million other folks are doing. In that vein, my wife and I are starting a new Thanksgiving Tradition and the turkey shall forever be in a frozen state. Witness our rebellion:

• Baby Back Ribs (fall off the bone delicous)
• Jamoosh's Not Yet Famous Pulled Pork (bathed in St. Arnold Amber)
• Jaclyn's Scratch Macaroni and Cheese (yum-ee)
• Crock Pot Baked Beans (the all day simmer - oh yeah)
• Pumpkin Cheesecake (our singular ode to tradition)

Can I get a "hell yeah!"

Listening to: Red Alert - Basement Jaxx

Closing Argument: You see, leftovers suck when you are not really a big fan of turkey. Ergo, why not eat something you'll need to enjoy for the next week.

Big Friday

Opening Statement

When in doubt, go big!

Since there was not going to be a run Saturday due to my injury (appointment on Tuesday), I used the opportunity to go big on Friday evening. Two big beers that is.

For the uninitiated, Big means Bombers and Bombers means 22 oz Bottles.

After indulging over several hours in a Stone 13th Anniversary Ale and a Green Flash Imperial IPA, I was feeling every bit the Hoposaurus Rex. If you don't like hoppy brews, I can only suggest keeping a two mile radius between you and these beers at all times.

    

The Green Flash Imperial IPA is lighter in color and pours with a sticky head - that means nice lacing my friends (lacing refers to the amount of head that sticks to the glass as one consumes their beverage). Nicely balanced and yummy , it provides a hop explosion in your mouth. Pleasantly bitter to be sure.

The Stone 13th Anniversary Ale is something to behold. This is a beer one could chew on. Perhaps they should rename it Big Red since technically it is a Double/Imperial Red - with a spanking of hops that is. You can taste the fat malt backbone, but really, it's just not enough to tame the hops - and I believe that is a good thing.

Both of these brews check in at over 9% abv. so suffice to say after enjoying them throughout a viewing of The Sure Thing and other assorted programming, I was feeling much like a happy camper. Sweet!

Daphne Zuniga - not a sure thing, but still looking good nearly 25 years later.

Listening to: Black Velvet - Alannah Myles

Closing Argument: Consider this, if goats had been running around in November instead of turkeys...

Last Mile Lounge - The Professor Is In

Opening Statement

This past week the Lounge set foot on campus and somehow survived squeeling coeds. Let's go back to school shall we?

Old or New or Middle School...

Cartoons

Old School - Scooby-Doo

Middle School - The Animaniacs

New School - The Penguins of Madagascar

Tough call between New and Middle school, but I'll take the Penguins in a photo finish

Running - Footwear

Old School - Converse

Middle School - Nike

New School - Barefoot

I played basketball in Converse All-Stars, but train barefoot for short distances - New School

Running - Distance

Old School - Cross Country

Middle School - 5K

New School - Half Marathon

New School in a landslide

Drama

Old School - Starsky and Hutch

Middle School - MacGyver

New School - CSI

Old school - Without question

Runner - Female

Old School - Wilma Rudolph

Middle School - Mary Decker

New School - Kara Goucher

Surprisingly, I am going Old School - the old footage of her running is amazing

Comedy

Old School - Welcome Back Kotter

Middle School - Seinfeld

New School - Two and a Half Men

Old School Mr. Kot-ter

Teen Idols

Old School - Davey Jones

Middle School - Rick Springfield

New School - Zac Efron

I happily refrain...

Pin Up

Old School - Farrah Fawcett

Middle School - Cindy Crawford

New School - Dita Von Teese

Sometimes it's best to be in the middle

Running Apparel

Old School - Headband

Middle School - Shiny shorts

New School - Garmin

I am so new school on this one

Soda

Old School - Coca Cola

Middle School - Jolt

New School - Red Bull

Stayin' old school, although Jolt did figure in heavily during the college years

Listening to: Daytona - Chris Rea

Closing Argument: Run happy; run free - may all your runs this weekend be splendiferous! 

Free Shampoo

Opening Statement

Teach your children well,
Their father's hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young

Yes, yes, teach the children well...

 
This is my niece Julia. You are probably saying to yourself that Uncle Jamoosh has taught her well. But if you look closely you will see that my work here is not done. Busch Light? Really! Young Julia, disappointment abounds. Not to worry, Jamoosh will set you on the straight and narrow. Isn't this what Uncles are for? I ask you, would you rather your children be corrupted by a purple dinosaur and peer pressure or a caring family member?

Thin is not In

This past week I stepped into a local eatery and used my God-given right to sample a Wasatch Polygamy Porter. Sad. This is a porter? You cannot be serious. I have enjoyed Black Lagers (ref: Sam Adams) with more body. I expect a porter to be deep and mellow; fat and robust; something I'll sit with next to a fire with, caressing a bead of sweat as it travels down the supple curve... Well, you get the idea.

Shampoofest

If the shampoo in my hotel were worth stealing, I would have enough to last until 2012 or the apocalypse (impressive, did you catch that timely reference). If I were actually stealing said shampoo and the other assorted condiments left on the sink, I could understand a replacement every evening when I return. But I am not. Hence, by Friday I have my own cult  of bathroom assundries collected on the counter. Five shampoos; Five conditioners; Five soaps... WTF?

Listening to: Miss America - Styx

Closing Argument: No beer was harmed during this post. 

Double Flush Denny

Opening Statement

I called a detox center - just to see how much it would cost: $13,000.00 for three weeks. My friends, if you can come up with thirteen grand, you don't have a problem yet! - The late (great) Sam Kinison

Over at Art and Soul, "Southofthecliff" wrote about ensuring one's digestive system is ready and willing to accept anything in the event the need to feed arises and one's only option is fast food. With this bit of sage wisdom in mind, I happily trekked into Denny's early yesterday morning for a colon blowing omelet.

Many a twilight moon has occured since my shadow permeated a Denny's doorway and obviously my digestive system was ill-prepared for the over the top doses of cholesterol that were introduced. Who knew that Denny's was one of the 10 ways to detoxify one's body. And I appreciate that one only has to wait a mere half hour before the flushing of one's internal organs begins.

In other news of wisdom, my university educated wife suggested doing core and push ups on one leg. So that pretty much killed my excuse to get out of it due to a foot injury. That said, once again I am happy to report that my awesomeness knows no bounds. In fact, dare I say it, but me thinks the tripod plank position is possibly easier than the quad. Go figure. 

Listening to: Entering Bootytown - Haley Bennett

Closing Argument: You must give Standard Deviation its due - recognize!

No Left Feet

Opening Statement

Ouch - Doh! Ouch - Doh! Ouch - Doh! Yeah, that's me with each step...

This morning it was up, up and away into a mass of gray; pushing through into the blue – Denver bound on a trip that would eventually take me to Salt Lake City. By the way, I can only describe Denver approach from the East as desolate. For those under the impression that Colorado is a mountainous state, think again. Much of it is as flat as the Texas panhandle, right up until you run smack dab into the Rocky Mountains.

Saturday running in Houston was good and bad. Good because during the week I am running in 30 and 40 degree temperatures and dry air in Utah and on the weekend I run in 60 degree temperatures and 90% humidity in Houston…and about 4000 feel closer to sea level! Thus the ten miles on Saturday was relatively easy from an aerobic standpoint.

That said, something has gone wrong in the left foot, which is the bad news. I am pretty sure that pain and electrical shocks shooting through the foot is not a good thing. Hopefully, I will be able to arrange an appointment with a doctor who can either confirm or deny my concern.

By the way, this time of year, you can definitely distinguish us Southern folk from the hearty Midwesterners since apparently the Colorado State Budget does not allow for heating the Denver International Airport. WTF – are they trying to make the Canadians feel at home? 

Enough for the moment.

Listening to: Out Here All NIght - Damone

Closing Argument: Witnessed – Gray slacks, white pressed shirt, black tie and a big ass Batman belt buckle, that may or may not double as a utility belt. Dork or Nerd? Is this person merely passing through or does he represent a slice of the Colorado population?

Last Mile Lounge - Shiny Happy Medals

Opening Statement

The Lounge has opted to stack some wood and set the fireplaze ablaze. That's right, we're all cuddling in the Lounge today.

 
Is one of these guys a future Jamoosh?

Last  week the Lounge featured a commentary on slower runners and garnered some support from the disciples. This week, the disciples may rebel - perhaps I should offer chocolate...

My wife and I have met a Houston woman on several occasions at marathons around the United States. She has walked a marathon in all 50 states and I can tell you that she has earned each and every medal. As I passed her during one race (she started early, which was allowed), I could tell how much effort she was putting into the endeavour. She was pushing as hard as she could and her speech was clipped when we talked. She is definitely one of the feel good stories about marathoning.

One of the jobs of a Marathon Coach with the Houston Fit Yellow Group is to play the role of the sweeper. The job of the sweeper is to ensure the last runner in the group makes it back to Memorial Park safely. Sometimes being the sweeper is rewarding and sometimes it just pisses you off. The rewarding part is getting to run with an individual who may be struggling (perhaps because of the distance, maybe because of the weather), but is genuinely trying their hardest to complete their run.

On the flip side, there are times when you have to run walk someone in who shouldn't be there at all. You can tell they have not been putting in the time and you know darn well they have not been following the training plan. On marathon day, this person will run, walk and shuffle their way to a medal - thanks to extended course hours. How does it make you feel, knowing someone made a half-assed effort and received the very same award and status as you?

Trust me when I tell you that on race day there are many people who do not belong on the course. You can tell me anything you want about achievement or the fact that "hey, at least they are out doing something" but the reality is that these runners put themselves and others at risk, all for a shiny medal and the "honor" of saying, "I did it."

Believe me, this has nothing to do with being slow. It has everything to do, in my mind, with earning it. Further, I am not only referring to first time marathoners who perhaps didn't understand what was necessary to run a marathon and were too lazy to put in the hours. I am also calling out runners who, by virtue of completing a marathon, figured they could do it again although they didn't train appropriately.

Hey, it's not billed as a 26.2 mile fun run and I am offended that you think you can just wing it.

If it is your goal to run a marathon - perhaps it is on your bucket list; maybe you want to get healthy - why would you put in a superficial effort? Isn't a goal something you work for? As most runners will tell you, the satisfaction of finishing a marathon is due in part because of the journey.  

Let me take a different tack. I have a question for the peeps out there: Would you run an unofficial marathon? Seriously, consider it. No medal, no finisher shirt, no recorded time, no fans (OK, perhaps your family), no organization, no police securing the course, no water stations, no, no, and no. Would you train for six months or even a year and on a random Saturday leave your house and return 26.2 miles later?

There is no medal; there is no shirt; but you are a marathon finisher. You should be accorded the same respect as someone who runs an officially sanctioned marathon. That said, if you are only in it for the trinket, then...

Listening to: Master Blaster (Jammin') - Stevie Wonder

Closing Argument: The Jamoosh Invitational - coming in January.